I LOVE YOU MY FRIEND (FAN FICTION) (CHAPTER 38)

CHAPTER 38

    The next day Jaejoong went out of his room. It was already 7 in the morning. He knew he needed to prepare breakfast. He was still  not feeling well, but he needed to do something just to stop himself from thinking about Lena. Eventhough his wounds were already healing . . . his heart was still hurting.

    He weakly entered the kitchen. But was quite surpised to see who were already up. All the other DBSK boys were already in the kitchen and were already having breakfast.

    "Good morning!" Max greeted.

    "You're up already? Sorry if we didn't wake you up to have breakfast with us. We figured that you might not want to have breakfast yet . . . and would just want to sleep and rest instead," Micky explained.

    "It's okay . . . But why are you guys up so early anyway?" Jaejoong asked curiously.

    Xiah, Micky, Max and U-Know suddenly exchanged glances with each other. Somehow they didn't know if they should tell him the truth.
    
    U-Know stared at Jaejoong seriously. "We're supposed to do a radio interview today at noon," he suddenly said.

    "A radio interview? How? Oh . . . I remember . . .so Daichi's mother followed Lena's conditions. So now I'm guessing that my father and sisters have their jobs back. I should be happy right?" Jaejoong tried to put on a fake smile.

    "Our manager said that you need to see a doctor. So that your wounds would heal without any scars, especially those on your face. He also said that he will bring you to a doctor this afternoon after the radio interview," U-Know said slowly.

    "So does this mean that I'm not being removed from the our group anymore?" Jaejoong asked sarcastically.

    Xiah slowly shook his head. All of them could sense the unhappiness that their friend was feeling.

    Jaejoong suddenly stared at the food infront of him. He then smiled bitterly.

    "Lena cooked me a wonderful breakfast . . . and I wasn't able to eat it . . . even one small bite. And now I don't know how it tasted. She must have spent hours making me those dishes . . . and it just all went to waste. I wonder what kind of food she's having now . . . or maybe she's still sleeping . . . or maybe . . ."

    "Hyung . . . stop it! You're just hurting yourself. Stop thinking about her. For your sake and her sake . . . stop it. Just let her go," Max slowly uttered.

    Jaejoong tried to smile. "Don't worry. I'm fine. I can live without her . . . like the way she can live without me. I'm hungry . . .I want to eat," he said as he quickly sat and started to fill a bowl with different kinds of foods.

    He had already swallowed a spoonful of food when his tears started to fall. As he continued to eat, his tears continued to stream down his face.

    The other DBSK boys just watched helplessly as their friend tried to eat. How their hearts ached as they watched his tears slowly fall.

    A week passed . . . .

    All of Jaejoong's wounds had already healed perfectly well. No one could even tell that he had been beaten badly just a few days passed. His total appearance was back to normal.

    All of the DBSK boys' activities have been resumed and all of the reports and rumors about their group being disbanded were finally cleared out. They were all back to their normal busy schedule.

    But despite of all the work that was keeping the DBSK boys busy . . . there were still times that Jaejoong couldn't stop himself from thinking about Lena.

    He was still wondering how she was doing . . . where she was . . . and if she was thinking of him too.

    How his heart ached everytime he remembered her. How he wished that all his feelings would just go away. He wanted to be free of the pain. He wanted to forget. He wanted to let go . . . But his heart was refusing everything that his mind was dictating. He still longed for her.

    Every night, he would imagine that he was still holding her. And every morning, he would wake up hoping to see her lying next to him.

    "Where are you Lena? Whatever happened to you? I miss you," Jaejoong uttered as he stared out of the window in his room.

    In another part of Tokyo . . . .

    "Lena, you should be resting. What are you looking at anyway?" Daichi asked softly.

    Lena smiled. "Nothing. I couldn't sleep. So I decided to just stare at the sky for a while."

    "Don't lie. You're thinking about him . . ." Daichi uttered.

    Lena suddenly lowered her head. Daichi was right. She was thinking about Jaejoong. She was wondering if he was thinking of her too. She couldn't stop herself. She was badly missing him.

    "It's been a week Lena. He's already appeared in a show. He's back to his usual self again. So you don't have to worry about him anymore," Daichi uttered.

    "I know . . . I already watched that he was in," she replied. "I'm glad that he's already moved on."

    "Lena . . . you don't have to be worried anymore. You can go back to him again. My mother has already learned her lesson. And she already asked for your forgiveness, didn't she? . . . And aside from that, she said that she wasn't going to interfere in your relationship with Jaejoong anymore. So you can go back to him . . . I know you're missing him," Daichi sadly uttered.

    Lena slowly shook her head. Then she smiled bitterly. "I can't go back to him anymore . . ." she said sadly.
   
    "Lena, it's obvious that you're missing him. And I know he's missing you as well," Daichi said.

    Lena suddenly looked at Daichi with extreme sadness in her eyes. "Look at me, Daichi. I think you're forgetting something . . . Even if I wanted to . . . I can't possibly go back to him now."
   
    Daichi stared at Lena. It was only then he realized what was wrong. Lena was sitting on a wheelchair. Half of her body, from her waist up to her legs was already paralyzed. They had already consulted several doctors and all of them said the same thing. They couldn't find anything wrong with her physically. He spinal cord wasn't injured like what the first doctor suspected. So there was no physical cause for her paralysis. They all recommended Lena to be sent to a psychiatrist for further evaluation.

    After hearing this, Lena and Daichi went to several psychiatrists to have her examined. Tests were done and repeated over and over again. Until finally, the doctors concluded that Lena's condition was just caused by a mental condition she was going through.

    Daichi asked the doctors how Lena can be cured. And to Daichi's dismay, all of them replied that Lena's recovery solely depends on her own will to be cured. It may take weeks, months, years and there was also a big possibility that she would no longer recover. The only thing that Daichi and Lena could do was wait.

    "Lena . . . I'm sorry . . ." Daichi uttered hopelessly.

    Lena smiled. "What are you saying sorry for?"

    "For everything that my mother did . . . to you and Jaejoong," Daichi answered.

    "Whatever your mother did . . . doesn't have anything to do with you. So you don't have to say sorry. And just like what you said before, your mother already asked for my forgiveness and I already forgave her. So there's no need to continuously say sorry. Just stop saying sorry and please stop feeling pity for me . . . I can see what you're feeling through your eyes," Lena slowly uttered.

    Daichi suddenly knelt down infront of Lena. "Why are you so kind? Aren't you even bit angry with my mother? Because of her . . . you might end up staying on a wheelchair all of your life . . .Because of her . . . you might end up losing the only man that you love."

    Lena slowly shook her head. "I love your mother like my own mother. How could I possibly get angry with her or even hate her? I believe what happened . . . happened for a reason. Maybe Jaejoong and I weren't supposed to be together. . . in the first place. That's why fate is already stepping in and separating us."

    Daichi looked at Lena's beautiful face. Despite of the courage she was showing, sadness and fear were hidden in her eyes. "What do you plan to do now? Are you really sure you don't want to see him? I'm sure that he will gladly accept you despite . . . ."

    "Despite of the fact that I'm already crippled? No . . . I don't want him to see me like this. I know the moment that he sees me . . . he will just pity me. He will somehow feel responsible for what happened to me. He will surely blame himself. And I don't want him to saty with me just because of guilt. If I enter his life again, I will just ruin everything for him again . . . his life . . . his career . . . his family. He's better off without me. I will only be a burden to him. I know . . . he will eventually learn to forget me. He will surely meet another girl that would be able to give him happiness without any complications. As time goes by . . . both of us will learn to forget each other," Lena said as tears slowly dropped from her eyes, one by one.

    "I wish I could take all of your pain away. I wish I could take your place on that wheelchair. I would gladly do anything . . . just to make you happy," Daichi uttered lovingly.

    "Would you really do anything for me?" Lena slowly asked with sadness in her eyes.

    "Yes," he answered immediately.

    "Then . . . let's leave Japan as soon as possible. I don't want to stay here anymore. Take me anywhere . . . as long it is far from Jaejoong. I don't want him to see me like this. I want him to live a happy life without me. If I stay here in Japan or in Korea, there's always the possibility of us crossing each other's paths. I don't want to bother him anymore. I've already decided . . . I'm already letting him go," Lena uttered as tears continuously flowed from her eyes.

    Daichi suddenly embraced Lena. "Don't worry. I'll take care of you . . .I'll take care of everything. We'll leave Japan and I'll help you to forget him."

    Lena suddenly lost her self-control. She suddenly started to cry uncontrollably in Daichi's arms. How she wished that she just died after separating with Jaejoong.

    "Jaejoong . . . I love you. . . Goodbye . . . Goodbye . . ." she continuously uttered in her mind as her tears flowed.